Back to the basics

I feel like I've kind of lost myself lately, especially in the last few months. I want to get back to me.

I used to know who I was. Now I've got some questions, but I feel like I have a general idea, and it is what keeps me going through. I am a nerd. Not in the fake 3D glasses, bright neon colors and fake suspenders way with a cute side ponytail. No, I am the person who holes herself up in bed to finish the latest in whatever installment I've been reading. The person who normally would rather spend a Friday or Saturday night by myself cleaning, organizing, and maybe watching the Food Network. I'm the kind of person who would rather play with my little brothers than half of the people I know. That is because I tend to be a bit of a homebody. Shocking, I know, but totally the truth. Don't get me wrong, I can go out and have a great time like no one's business, but later on I look back and go "yeah, that was great, but I could have started (insert book title here) and made Eggplant Parmesan" I feel like this year has stretched me in ways I wasn't expecting. I've learned the art of deception, and I hate it. Granted, I don't use it because I still believe that 95% of the time it is better to tell the truth, but the fact that I have those thoughts leaves me slightly disgusted with myself.

Okay, enough time has been wasted avoiding homework. I need to focus. That is something else I lost, the ability to sit for hours at one task (unless it is reading)

Love,

M.