So, in a few short hours we are going to know the results.
I don't know how to feel about all of this.
Part of me wants to win, the other wants to lose.
I'm kind of terrified at what I've signed myself up for. I think that we are definitely more qualified and have better plans, but I don't know if I can handle it. I hate it when people don't like me, and I feel like that always happens with the president. I don't like the thought of my time no longer being mine (not that it really is right now anyway) and I am petrified of screwing up. But I think the difference is that I realize just how badly things could go, and my friend doesn't. From the vibe I'm getting he is taking it very lightly-almost like a joke- and that thought scares me more. People tell me we're a "shoo-in" and that makes me want to throw up. We didn't have the time to go out and bother people to vote, and almost anyone who heard both platforms realizes that we should win. But what if we don't. What happens then? I quit SGA? I leave the organization that I've loved and cared for for the last two years. Leave a place where I feel I can make progress for other students, leave a place where I've found some of my closest friends? It seems foreign, but it also seems like the only thing to do. I can't work under them. I can't watch my ideas fall to the way side when I know they are good ones. I just don't know. We will know the results in 15 hours. 15 hours left until my questions are answered and new ones arise. What next? That's all I want to know. What next?
Also, I've taken to writing in an actual journal, because I fear that it's becoming a lost art, but I've missed my blog.
